A few words about business class...

Although I think of myself as being fairly well traveled, this trip marks the first time that I have ever flown in business class. And, I have to say, what a very civilized means of transport it is. The British Airways Lounge at JFK is a world unlike any I’ve ever previously experienced at an airport. Instead of the usual uncomfortable waiting in a dreary room filled with screaming children and, worse, their brutish parents -- who all too often thunder into their cellphones while shoveling bits of greasy fast food into their gaping yaps -- what awaited me in the BA lounge was quite different. It was the delightful sound of water cascading from a large serenity fountain.

I enjoyed this peaceful auditory oasis from the comfort of a plush chair in a sun-splashed room while nibbling on a complimentary continental breakfast. Across the lounge a juice bar caught my attention, bewitching me with the promise of its sweet, exotic orange, grapefruit and cranberry nectars. I also soon discovered that my liquid options weren’t limited to juice. A full range of adult beverages were also at at my disposal, though upon reflection I decided not to avail myself of them since it was merely eight o’clock in the morning.


Not to be outdone, the men’s room held surprises of its own. Chief among them was an unexpected and highly pleasant citrus aroma the likes of which I’d never previously had the good fortune to associate with an airport, yet alone with an airport restroom. What the nose delivered in scents the eyes quickly matched with images. The bathroom’s handsome features, including its fine wood-paneled stalls, were both extremely functional and quite elegant at once.


However, it was then, upon entering the stall, that I learned a fundamental truth about business class. For it was there in the sleek white porcelain toilet I spied a golf-ball sized turd floating aimlessly in its own little ocean of filth. The lesson, of course, was simple: It turns out that it doesn’t matter if you’ve paid $10 or 10,000 for your airline ticket, or if you’re in a special lounge. At the end of the day, fancy or plain, rich or poor, public restrooms are pretty damn nasty.